LovingU Relationship Test
- Read each question and place a P next to the issues that you have experienced in the past & a C next to the issues that you are currently experiencing. P/C if it is both past & current. Use N/A for not applicable. Place a P/C for current issues that have also occurred in your past.
- Tally up the number of P’s, C's, P/C's, and N/A marks and enter the number on the test: (P’s ___ C’s ____ and P/C’s____ N/A____)
- ____ Your current or past relationship feels/felt like a roller coaster ride.
- ____ You broke up with someone and are still suffering.
- ____ Someone broke up with you and you are suffering.
- ____ Your partner just told you that he/she is no longer in love with you.
- ____ You think or know that your partner is cheating on you.
- ____ You are thinking about cheating on your partner because you don’t think you will ever get what you want from your relationship.
- ____ You haven’t had sex in ages.
- ____ You are single and haven’t been actively dating for months or years.
- ____ You are newly single.
- ____ You are still angry at the opposite sex.
- ____ You think living alone is better than having a partner.
- ____ You think that women/men only want one thing.
- ____ You are shy about approaching and initiating conversation.
- ____ You can’t stand the thought of living alone.
- ____Your relationship is causing you a lot of drama and trauma.
- ____ You or your partner has no interest in having sex / making love.
- ____You are having a relationship with someone who is married and they are not married to you.
- ____You are tired of meeting people who do not meet your needs.
- ____You keep on meeting the wrong kind of guys or girls.
- ____You can’t seem to get beyond the 3rd date.
- ____You are in a relationship with someone who is emotionally unavailable.
- ____You have a challenging time expressing your emotions.
- ____You are very nervous asking someone out.
- ____You are uncomfortable flirting.
- ____You are going through a divorce or separation right now.
- ____You are going through a custody battle.
- ____You can’t forget your ex.
- ____Your heart feels like it’s being put through a meat grinder.
- ____The frequency of fights and conflict is increasing.
- ____You can’t seem to resolve issues in the relationship and they get pushed under the carpet.
- ____There is physical violence in the relationship.
- ____You find it easier to tell white lies or omit details about things that might be potentially upsetting to your partner than telling the whole truth.
- ____ The closer you want to get to your partner the more they push you away.
- ____ The more you push your partner away the more he/she wants you.
- ____You can’t commit.
- ____You choose partners that can’t commit to you.
- ____You keep on finding people who need or want your help and then they leave you.
- ____You become the mommy or the daddy in the relationship.
- ____You find people who try to dominate and control you.
- ____You find relationships with people who are abusive.
- ____You find relationships with people who are drug or alcohol abusers.
- ____You don’t seem to ever get what you really want in love and life.
- ____You are in a relationship for over 5 years and you or your partner has not proposed.
- ____You don’t feel attractive.
- ____You find yourself comparing dates to past relationships.
- ____You partner is deceased and you are not completely healed.
- ____You feel burned out about love.
- ____You are frequently disappointed in your partner.
- ____Your partners refuse to grow and change.
- ____You’ve tried dating services and/or personal ads and they don’t seem to work.
- ____You’ve done something to upset your partner and you want to make it better.
- ____You want to get your partner back in your life.
- ____You find yourself settling for less than what you deserve.
- ____You would rather have a better than nothing relationship than risk having a true soulmate.
- ____You regularly sabotage yourself in relationships.
- ____You always seem to become the “teacher” in your relationships.
- ____You’ve read all kinds of self-help books and taken seminars and are still not getting the results that you want.
- ____You want to end a relationship but don’t know how or if it’s the right action to take.
- ____You think you intimidate men or women.
- ____ You can’t forgive your partner for something s/he did.
- ____You find yourself saying things like “The good ones are already taken.”
- ____You have a tendency to be a workaholic.
- ____You have a difficult time asking for what you want.
- ____You are too much of a giver.
- ____You are a taker in a relationship.
- ____You procrastinate too much.
- ____You have never been in love.
- ____You have never had a “real” relationship.
- ____You fall in love too easily.
- ____ You have never been able to tell someone “I love you.”
- ____You have never been sent flowers.
- ____You didn’t have anyone to celebrate your birthday or Valentines Day with.
- ____There is emotional abuse in the relationship.
- ____You had a traumatic childhood.
- ____ One of your parents was critical of you and difficult to please.
- ____One of your parents was very dominating and controlling.
- ____You attract sexually dysfunctional people for relationships.
- ____The wrong kind of people seem to want to be in relationship with you.
- ____You are attracted to “bad” boys or girls.
- ____You are always attracted to someone who is much older than you.
- ____You are only attracted to people who are much younger than you.
- ____You fear becoming a parent because you are concerned that certain parental traits will surface in you, that you experienced with your parents.
- ____Your biological clock is ticking and you are concerned about becoming a parent before it’s too late.
- ____You open up very slowly with others.
- ____Trust is a very big issue with you and relationships.
- ____It’s been longer than 6 months since you have been on a date.
- ____ Your partner has lied to you.
- ____ Children are affecting your relationship.
- ____ Money issues are affecting your relationship.
- ____Your partner is having an affair with someone of the same sex.
- ____ You know you have unexpressed anger that needs to be released.
- ____ You want the best relationship possible.